GUARANTEE

     I have been making machines for quite a while now and have learned a few things about making a reliable and robust sculpture.  I have been pleasantly surprised to find thirty year old machines still chuggin' along.  Inevitably, however, some machines will need a little TLC to bring them back to life.  As a young man, I would tell people, "all my sculptures come with a lifetime guarantee, that is, my lifetime...", (ba-dump), confident that I would live forever.  So far, so good.  But just in case things don't work out as I plan, here is my modified guarantee:

     If there is something wrong with your sculpture, you may send it back to me for repair.  I will bring it up to nominal specs and send it back to you for not much more than the cost of parts plus shipping.  Just contact me for shipping information.

     In the unlikely event that I don't live forever and am, therefore no longer able to repair your sculpture, the value of your sculpture, created by a dead artist should increase exponentially.  You may confirm the value of your artwork by placing it up for auction at Christie's or Sotheby's.
(eBay?...Buy-N-Save?...CycleTrader?)